Honestly after that one time a black widow lived in my car door for several months this is nothing. And there was that other time I went walking in the woods and found a quarter sized spider chilling in my hair half-an-hour later.
You’re like the goddamn Spider Queen. I am terrified of you. If I found a spider in my hair I’d have to set myself on fire. It would be my only option.
Do you ever feel like shouting your own arguments at the screen? Especially at the end. It’s the rhetorician in me.
Also? This was the first time I had played with Sebastian. I do not understand the love for him—he’s an ass. Want me to kill Anders, do you? My BFF? FUCK YOU. Go ahead and bring your goddamn armies, I defeated the fucking Qunari and felled the Arishok in single combat. I WILL STOMP THE SHIT OUT OF YOUR WHINY LITTLE STARKHAVEN BITCHES.
the sims could live in hogwarts and interact with other students and go to classes and shit and instead of the skills being athletic, logic, gardening etc it could be potions, charms, transfiguration, etc
why the fuck hasn’t this happened yet
Seriously, I would play the fuck out of this game.
First there’s the kind where you’re in a dark room and a guy in a spooky mask jumps out of a cupboard going “abloogy woogy woo.” That would be your Doom 3.
Then there’s the kind where the guy in a spooky mask isn’t in a cupboard but standing right behind you and you just know he’s gonna go “abloogy woogy woo” at some point, but he doesn’t and you’re getting more and more tense but you don’t want to turn around ‘cause he might stick his cock in your eye. That would be your Silent Hill 2.
And then there are the horror games where the guy in the spooky mask goes “abloogy woogy woo” while standing on the far side of a brightly lit room before walking slowly over to you plucking a violin and then slapping you in the face with a t-bone steak. That would be your Dead Space.
See, the second one is best because your imagination is doing all the work. All a good horror game needs to do is hand you a piece of sandpaper and shout encouragement as you vigorously massage your own undercarriage.